adventuresofcesium:

remember when Andy scored among the highest ever on the aptitude test for becoming a police officer but then was denied because the interview showed that he was too kind and trusting and empathetic to be a cop

(via ptrparker)

21 hours ago · 489,930 notes · Source

xizv:

*does drugs but won’t eat white bread*

(via thisis4mathilda)

21 hours ago · 39,289 notes · Source

(via wantanythingfromtheshop)

23 hours ago · 275,800 notes · Source

(via thisis4mathilda)

23 hours ago · 541,981 notes · Source

classymike44:

The Parent Trap Dance.

(via wantanythingfromtheshop)

23 hours ago · 107,128 notes · Source

  • me on my way home from class: oh man i'm gonna get so much work done let me make a to do list and get that shit done quickly and effectively i'm so pumped
  • me the second i get home: nah

1 day ago · 237,008 notes · Source

(via nothingbutfiller)

1 day ago · 84,699 notes · Source

yourackdisciprine:

A recent trend on RTE (Irish TV) chat shows - random audience members turning to stare into the cameras during audience cut-aways.

(via nothingbutfiller)

1 day ago · 36,796 notes · Source

wookiej:

Spanish Teacher: ¿Cómo estás?

Me: Estoy bitchin’

(via thisis4mathilda)

1 day ago · 296,248 notes · Source

allaboutchinese:

世界上最浪漫的故事,不是罗密欧与朱丽叶一起死去,而是奶奶和爷爷一起老去。The most romantic love story isn’t Romeo and Juliet, who died together, but grandpa and grandma who grew old together.

allaboutchinese:

世界上最浪漫的故事,不是罗密欧与朱丽叶一起死去,而是奶奶和爷爷一起老去。
The most romantic love story isn’t Romeo and Juliet, who died together, but grandpa and grandma who grew old together.

(via theworldofchinese)

1 day ago · 182 notes · Source

airspaniel:

drunkwario:

Anon hate from the late 1800’s.

What I love most about this is that this person was SO INCENSED at the recipient that they couldn’t even wait the days/weeks it would take for the mail to go through. No, they had to say “FUCK YOU” as soon as fucking possible and, AND, let the recipient that they were not done with the fuck you, nay, this was merely the first volley in what would undoubtably be a dressing down of Biblical proportions.

airspaniel:

drunkwario:

Anon hate from the late 1800’s.

What I love most about this is that this person was SO INCENSED at the recipient that they couldn’t even wait the days/weeks it would take for the mail to go through. No, they had to say “FUCK YOU” as soon as fucking possible and, AND, let the recipient that they were not done with the fuck you, nay, this was merely the first volley in what would undoubtably be a dressing down of Biblical proportions.

(via wantanythingfromtheshop)

1 day ago · 198,247 notes · Source

"I just wanna tell y’all that you’re my new heroes."

"Well, put some skates on. Be your own hero.

(via wantanythingfromtheshop)

1 day ago · 19,017 notes · Source

(via thisis4mathilda)

1 day ago · 349,415 notes · Source

night-catches-us:

when nicki starts spittin’ bey look like such a proud mama. like dats my baby, come get some.

image

(via thisis4mathilda)

2 days ago · 13,065 notes · Source

kobetyrant:

me when I got money: ha! broke ass bitch how the dollar menu taste? I wouldn’t know because it’s Big Macs only around here hoe!!!!

me when I’m broke: capitalism is inhumane and must be put to an end.

(via thisis4mathilda)

2 days ago · 30,834 notes · Source